Today's Tip • TAC : The Art of Conversation : Listen and respond / Upping
Waiting for a person to finish speaking, only to add to the conversation is considered Upping. They talk about a dog, then the person responding talks about their dog. It is a rude way to add to a conversation. Taking away a person's power of control leads to devaluing. It is a tough habit to beat, since most of the time we're simply trying to relate to that individual to show we understand what's going on in their mind.
A great first step is; listen to what is being said. Adding to a conversation is more about bringing out and showing interest in what was just heard. Respond to people with genuine interest to hear more about said subject. The conversation is about the other person's needs. When they are finished speaking, acknowledge that subject matter with inquisitive responses. Less a question, but more a thought of delving deeper into that conversation.
Listening a responding starts and ends with the other person. Best advice is usually a person's own experience. When you are talking with another person and they ignore your emotional attachment to what you just said by making it about them; that is upping without listening properly. If you don't like how it feels, imagine what they are feeling when it is done to them.
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