Monday, October 3, 2011

Today's Tip – TAC WEEK!!! --- How to say it...With, not to;


TAC WEEK!!!! "The Art of Conversation"
How to say it...With, not to; Indirect conversation vs direct conversation.

One of the core rules in TAC: The Art of Conversation, comes down to “How to say it... With, not to”. Indirect conversation is simple. Indirect is when you talk about something such as the weather outside, a color of a room or even how busy it is in that particular venue. Direct conversation (which is talking to a person) is searching for information from a person directly. Asking questions such as “What is your name?”, “Are you the person I would have to talk with about this.”, “Hey could I have a show?” etc, are all examples of talking directly to a person. Know the difference because it will make a difference with YOUR first impression to someone new.

You only get maybe 3-13 seconds for a quick glance of judgment, or about 2-3 minutes for someone to evaluate you when you meet for the first time. In this short time, the other person forms an opinion about you based on your appearance, your body language, your demeanor, your mannerisms, and how you are dressed. You can by-pass this through knowing “How to say it...” If you talk with someone indirectly they are not judging you. Since it is not so much a conversation to them for “something”, or an impression of “wanting something from them”, but more that you just began a genuine conversation with said person about nothing. That's the key, talk about nothing for it will lead to something.

Don't be a monkey in a suit throwing random thoughts around at the wall hoping it all sticks. Just make it simple. Look around to see what's going on in that area, see what is your biggest nothing topic and engage. For practice just talk with random people about nothing. Start up conversation with your supermarket cashier. Even when you get deli in the morning, because who doesn't like a nice yummy egg sandwich, you can start a conversation about nothing with your server. Remember, no one likes being placed into a corner with responsibility... If you ever get confused think about what you like and don't like about being talked “TO”, and how you like to be talked “WITH”. You are a good barometer to make the distinction.

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